36 Daniel Goleman Quotes On Emotional Empathy And Relationships

Smart phones and social media expand our universe. We can connect with others or collect information easier and faster than ever.

If your emotional abilities aren’t in hand, if you don’t have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can’t have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far.

True compassion means not only feeling another’s pain but also being moved to help relieve it.

In a high-IQ job pool, soft skills like discipline, drive and empathy mark those who emerge as outstanding.

One way to boost our will power and focus is to manage our distractions instead of letting them manage us.

A prerequisite to empathy is simply paying attention to the person in pain.

There is zero correlation between IQ and emotional empathy… They’re controlled by different parts of the brain.

The amygdala in the emotional center sees and hears everything that occurs to us instantaneously and is the trigger point for the fight or flight response.

Empathy and social skills are social intelligence, the interpersonal part of emotional intelligence. That’s why they look alike.

There is zero correlation between IQ and emotional empathy… They’re controlled by different parts of the brain.

The amygdala in the emotional center sees and hears everything that occurs to us instantaneously and is the trigger point for the fight or flight response.

I think the smartest thing for people to do to manage very distressing emotions is to take a medication if it helps, but don’t do only that. You also need to train your mind.

But once you are in that field, emotional intelligence emerges as a much stronger predictor of who will be most successful, because it is how we handle ourselves in our relationships that determines how well we do once we are in a given job.

The basic premise that children must learn about emotions is that all feelings are okay to have; however, only some reactions are okay.

Emotional ‘literacy’ implies an expanded responsibility for schools in helping to socialize children. This daunting task requires two major changes: that teachers go beyond their traditional mission and that people in the community become more involved with schools as both active participants in children’s learning and as individual mentors.

The emotional brain responds to an event more quickly than the thinking brain.

Emotions are contagious. We’ve all known it experientially. You know after you have a really fun coffee with a friend, you feel good. When you have a rude clerk in a store, you walk away feeling bad.

Teachers need to be comfortable talking about feelings. This is part of teaching emotional literacy – a set of skills we can all develop, including the ability to read, understand, and respond appropriately to one’s own emotions and the emotions of others.

Whenever we feel stressed out, that’s a signal that our brain is pumping out stress hormones. If sustained over months and years, those hormones can ruin our health and make us a nervous wreck.

Scheduling down time as part of your routine is hard but worth it, personally, even professionally.

The other thing is that if you rely solely on medication to manage depression or anxiety, for example, you have done nothing to train the mind, so that when you come off the medication, you are just as vulnerable to a relapse as though you had never taken the medication.

When it comes to exploring the mind in the framework of cognitive neuroscience, the maximal yield of data comes from integrating what a person experiences – the first person – with what the measurements show – the third person.

The more socially intelligent you are, the happier and more robust and more enjoyable your relationships will be.

Western business people often don’t get the importance of establishing human relationships.

But there has also been a notable increase in recent years of these applications by a much wider slice of psychotherapists – far greater interest than ever before.

We need to re-create boundaries. When you carry a digital gadget that creates a virtual link to the office, you need to create a virtual boundary that didn’t exist before

When I went on to write my next book, Working With Emotional Intelligence, I wanted to make a business case that the best performers were those people strong in these skills.

If you are doing mindfulness meditation, you are doing it with your ability to attend to the moment.

In politics, readily dismissing inconvenient people can easily extend to dismissing inconvenient truths about them.

Once shoppers become empowered, we will facilitate industries thinking in completely new terms; for example, making products that are totally biodegradable.

People tend to become more emotionally intelligent as they age and mature.

Societies can be sunk by the weight of buried ugliness.

Every morning, I go off to a small studio behind my house to write. I try to ignore all email and phone calls until lunchtime. Then I launch into the sometimes frantic busy-ness of a tightly scheduled day.

While there I began to study the Asian religions as theories of mind

Some children naturally have more cognitive control than others, and in all kids this essential skill is being compromised by the usual suspects: smartphones, TV, etc. But there are many ways that adults can help kids learn better cognitive control.

However, I began meditating at about that time and have continued on and off over the years.

My hope was that organizations would start including this range of skills in their training programs – in other words, offer an adult education in social and emotional intelligence.

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